Is it the struggle or is it a will to suffer.

I haven’t been able to answer this. I haven’t been able to write as I long to do. Today I found myself ahead in my work, behind in my feelings, and ready to assign to this writing the attributes of a victory.

About a month ago, I began working at a corporate law firm, dealing with clients who’s names you’ve probably heard of, and the persons who are under their monetary might perhaps less known.

It isn’t an evil business. It is a quest for equity. But what is evil is depriving myself liberty. That is, a soul’s right to breathe.

But that isn’t what this is about. It’s about an expression of freedom and the apex of my enjoyment.

Behind this titanic legal force lies pond, surrounded by several trails. In a wind-swept, wet evening, when ice still remains, but mud persists also, I ran.

There is a certain portion of said matrix wherein a lengthy footbridge connects two parcels of forest, separated by a field of wheat. Witness Elysium.

I certainly am not a hero, and I certainly am not a multi-theist. But I can only imagine the lavish and total appeasements that lie in such a place - Reserved for the bravest of ancient Rome.

I ran through this 8 mile course of ebullition without effort. Nearing the end, covered in rain, scarred by nature’s lashes, and unyielding in the pitch dark, I found something about physiological effort. I left my senses. I could feel the very sinews of my constitution fire with divine precision. And I have not forgotten it.

The limits of the human mind are bound only by the conscience’s cynicism. So when one works to abolish all the chains of impediments, and shatters the windows of dissent, one finds what they were engineered to become.

This comfort in pain is not restricted to this instance - Or in one of your own experience(s).

It transcends what we view as the ordinary. Whether it is the definite and seasonable terms of a relationship, whether a titanic decision in the world of steel and glass canyons, or perhaps the next 26 miles and 385 yards of your life’s fabric, you will find it.