This is how I thought I was soft:

In September, I sustained an impartial quad tear. So I couldn't run for quite a bit. I'd cycle like mad, use the elliptical, and try to run, thinking the endorphins would be at such point, that I could run. That didn't happen. At one point, I found I could run barefoot for some strange reason, so I ran laps around the footballl field in my barefeet, in the middle of the day. I'd be driving down the highway, when the crisp fall air would be arriving, I'd put down all the windows in my car, emulating some form of distant godawful weather, so when I would return, at least I was acclimated to the harsh, colder climates.
Then, once the tear mended, I began running, lightly. And then came my first 20 miler for Disney training. Oops, dislodged that f-ing S-1 joint again. Chiropractor, physical therapy, all that jazz.
So then, as I began to rehabilitate that, it became evident quite clear, that my left adductor was bearing alot of the compensatory weight...yay.
Throughout all of these, I considered myself inept, and considered myself to be soft, even though I was still training, just not running.

Now, with the hay in the barn, there ultimately isn't anything worth adding to my training except to rest, which brings makes me digress

Rest, to the endurance athlete is synonmous with soft, or the qualities therein. It is understood as predominance of timidity over courage; an appetite for ease over the tove of adventure. It is an obstacle not easily surmounted.

As I taper, I miss the excitement and danger, that comes with even the most peacefull of progress.
Tapering can also be a place of sheer fear, and unholy terror. Every twitch, movement, and irrational firing by some distanct synapse. can trigger a multitude of emotions, associated with ineptitude, physical maladity, and triple guessing even the most certain of outcomes.

There is one thing that is certain. It has been said, that for running to become part of one's life, it requires a degree of submission. The quality of a runner is not the same as the coffee shop one frequents, the purified mineral water you drink, or your taste in foreign film. It is quite literally part of who you are. For better or worse, being a runner is a part of your definition of yourself.

I want a tranquilizer. Some industrial strength sleep inducer, that puts me to sleep for about 4-5 days, something like a medically induced coma.
This tapering is torture. And not in the normal sense, but from that soft, pigeon feeling, of your first marathon, where every 4 mile taper run feels like 30 miles. Everything gets tight, everywhere.
I think either today, or Sunday, will be my last run before Disney. This tightness isn't exactly going away, but I can deal with it. I have before. So maybe just aqua running from here on out. I don't have a finite answer at this point, and am kind of cool with that.
I will keep you all updated as we approach the big day.

I want to express, what Christmas means to not just myself, and my immediate family, but to my collective experience.
It is the warmth of my bed on Christmas eve, with the muffled sound of my parents downstairs, knowing they are safe.
It is the safety of my future, the relief of another year past, and a desire to see the futre.
It is knowing that whatever may happen in the next 364 days, for this one night, I know that my family is together, content, and mutually content. That is how I see them, on this Christmas morning.
Merry Christmas all.

Under the advisement of many friends and colleagues, I decided to go light this morning.
5 miles easy pace. Left lateral hip was tight, but groin was quite loose, little to no pain. A few "ughs" here and there, but nothing serious.
After laying on the kitchen floor for a few minutes, I found the muscle which was tight, causing the rotation to be equally tight. I'm nearly certain it is the gluteus medius. I lay on my right side, legs stretched out. And move the left leg foward and backwards, while keeping the knee straight. This proves to be alleviating.
I recently found on my training log, all sorts of nifty tools to analyze my training more finitely.
Both average heart rate, aggregated with pace (running only), and total hours spent in each sport are attached.

Despite the rain, snow, and innate qualities of snail mail, the new shoes arrived.
To the left there's a picture, comparing the old with the new. Historically, I'm very meticulous about tracking mileage on my shoes. With these however, everything just fell apart. My log (trifuel.com) doesn't have equipment labels for shoes.

When I was injured back in October, I started using Mizuno Wave Alchemy's. At the same time, I took out my orthotics to let me impartial quad tear heal, (the orthotics raise the heel, thus placing greater stress on the vastus lateralis)
So now that the new shoes are here, I think I'm going to try and run tomorrow.

I also have my bio-skin compression sleeve, which I might use.The schedule says 12 miles. I haven't run since a 7 miler on Tuesday, and before that it was a 21 miler on Sunday.If anyone has any ideas on what to run tomorrow for distance, I'm all ears.I've been aqua-running intensely since Tuesday. The pain I get is in the medial left thigh, so I"m guessing either vastus medialis, or something in that vicinity.

Stats For The Day:

Aqua Running, Aerobic Intensity: 93 minutes.
Sleep: 9 hours

This is nothing new.
My first taper, I was on an elliptical trainer, with a brace on my knee. Boston was un with a brace, which quite literally became a part of my being until 2 months thereafter.
But this taper, as of today, is different.

I have aches and pains, nagging issues, and a little more than two weeks until the big show.
Moreover, I'm now out of my element. Classes are complete, and I'm home. I suddenly feel like I've become a member of AARP, as the only interaction I have during the day, are people 3 times my age.

There is something, inherent in my training, deep within the training logs, in the sub-text of my average weekly heart rate, that I'm not seeing.
It transcends rest, recovery, nutrition, and regenerative growth hormone. It is the root of the vast array of my ills.
I submit that it has to do with shoes. And that blasted snowstorm out in the mid-west, certifies the delay in my order of purshasing a new solution.
http://wwwapps.ups.com/etr
acking/tracking.cgi?trackn
um=1Z9774640309952503
If it isn't the shoes, then it must be the orthotics, the left is utterly destroyed, while the right is in tact.
Ironically, my left piriformis, SI joint, and anterior medial saritorius are the hot spots.

I cannot mold and wear new orthotics now, as I am already tapering. To change my biomechanics would be simply ludacrious.
In short, this taper is something I have no solution to. This storm must be ridden out.

Deciding

I've got a marathon in a little less than 3 weeks, and I've got a few nagging aches and pains I want to have gone by one week out. I run every other day, cross train on non-running days, and take one day off before my long run I intend to keep this until about the last 10 days, wherein I will begin taking more rest days.
I need to eradicate a stiff lower back, and a strong pain in my inner left groin area.
Stretching 3 x per day under physical therapist advisement.
To expedite healing, should I take complete rest days, like 3 or 4 in a row, to get rid of these pains, or can I cross train? I'm not sure which would heal me faster.

STATS:
Sleep: 7.2 hours
Run: 7 miles @ 7:46 pace
HeartRate:156
Cool and crisp, but blasted groin and back were tight.
Recovery Window: +34mins

Okay-
This post IS scheduled to follow a post on Dec. 16, which I do not yet see present.
My long run today went great, albeit I forgot what a wall felt like, and I had some pretty sore spots.
By in large, it went well. If for nothing else, it elevated my confidence for disney.
For this, I am grateful.
Thank you Lord.

Don't Stop Here
I lost my pace...
I'm close behind.

Alright, I don't want to belabor this point. But I've had the arguably- Wait no, THE rockiest season of training in my endurance career. I've had a impartial quad tear, and a strained ligament at the bottom of by already dysfunctional SI joint. Cross Country wove right into Disney training. I've been bplanning this for a long time, and I'm running Disney.
Tomorrow, is my last 20 miler, one of two I will have accumulated in the last two months, and one 21 miler way back in August (I know, this doesn't count, but whatever)
I want to be able to run free, every day, hammer it like the good old days. If I weren't running Disney, I know I would be hammering it right now.
I guess if there was one question, I can ask now, in retrospect, of the culmination of my injuries is the following:
Why can I train like a mad man, chronically overtrain, for almost 2 consecutive years without an injury, and then be riddled with injuries in such a short span of 4 months.
So after tomorrow, the taper begins. Now that this blog is back up to standards of blogger, I'll let you know what goes on after tomorrow's long run.